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Should The Sins of Our Spouses Fall on Us?

Should The Sins of Our Spouses Fall on Us?

identity of his own, that he has built. Rosenberg is not residing as a subservient shadow of Hefner, which is quite laughable as I think about it.

“It’s not really his fault,” Paul Klemer, 58, also of Amherst told the Globe. And, I totally agree with Klemer. Should spouses have to answer to for the impropriety of their partners?

Some years ago Rosenberg wrote a letter to his fellow Democratic senators that he had “enforced a firewall between my private life and the business of the Senate” when Hefner, his then-fiancee, purported to be involved with the internal affairs of Senate business.

Sadly, however, a bevy of aspersions are always cast on spouses, mostly wives, as - unappealing or unavailable- for the misdeeds, infidelities and predatory behaviors of their husbands.

But truth be told, however, cheating spouses behave the way they do for a sundry of reasons: insecurity, anger, revenge, jealously, lack of maturity, lack of impulse control, to end a marriage referred to as an “exit affair,” belief that sexting and flirting are harmless, co-occurring issues like drugs and alcohol impairing judgment, childhood abuse, and simply not knowing the difference between romantic intensity and long-term love, to name just a few.

So why is Rosenberg’s in the hot seat with the Senate for Hefner’s behavior?

Some argue for transparency in allowing victims to come forth without the fear of reprisal. Others argue for the integrity of the Senate to give a public display of zero tolerance for sexual harassment at the workplace and to restore public confidence. And many others simply want to know how could Rosenberg not know of Hefner’s egregious behavior, suggesting Rosenberg was “complicit,” the 2017 word of the year.

“Even though, based on what little I have been told, these allegations do not involve members or employees of the Senate and did not occur in the State House, I take them seriously,” Rosenberg read from his statement. “To the best of my recollection I was not approached by anyone with complaints during or after the alleged incidents made in this article or I would have tried to intervene.”

Trying to disentangle Rosenberg's innocence from Hefner’s transgressions is a classic example of the shackles and double binds placed on spouses.

Rosenberg’s political career, legacy, and legitimacy as an honest and trustworthy elected official moving forward are tarnished, if not tanked, in my opinion. And it's not for any wrongdoings he did but rather for the vile behavior of his spouse.