Newsflash! Christina Aguilera and Samantha Ronson are doin’ it! I first got this "news" via text from a friend, who I’ll call NX, at 7:35pm Saturday night. It read: “Newsflash! Christina Aguilera and Samantha Ronson are doin’ it. xoxo.” Total Gossip Girl moment. I told everyone I was with. My partner got the same text, so when I told her, she was already checking online and sure enough- it was online, and therefore it must be true.
Also, I want it to be true. All queer women want it to be true. She sings about hating boys, she’s got that S&M video, she kissed Madonna… I could go on and on with quotes she’s said in the media about loving women’s bodies, etc. but the boring “facts” are well, boring and who wants to read that? My research goes as far as looking on Perez Hilton.
Another reason I love this new “verified fact” is because Samantha is one of like 5 celesbians I actually find remotely attractive. So, you know, any gossip related to her I want to plunge right into.
Upon receiving “official confirmation”, my initial thought was: Nickname. What can we call this couple? Are name merges so passé? Brangelina started when- 5, 10 years ago? I’d check, but I’m too lazy to do much online research (see above). Regardless, I’m a sucker for a pun, so I’d like them to have a name. Brainstorm.
SamanXa. No, sounds dumb out loud.
X-antha. Too Xena, Warrior Princes.
SamTina. Not funny
TiSam. Too much like “TiBette”…but that might make it genius!
That’s it! TiSam. I love it. I’m missing the X though. I feel like the X should really be in there. I need help. Contest time! Name the XTina/Samantha Ronson name merge and you’ll win something awesome from Grace Moon!*
So later that night when I got home, I gazed at the Bionic album cover and noticed something very telling; the absolute proof I needed to sleep soundly. If you look real close, you’ll see the word “Lez” in teensy tiny letters in front of “Bionic”. BAM!
What more do you need?
xoxo Amy Nicole
*Your prize may or may not be an email from Grace Moon apologizing for the false promise of a prize of which she was unaware.