ThreeWay: Nice Girls Do

Julia: We're here today to speak of a sacred birthright.

Amy: That's right. MASTURBATION!

Julia: Preach! It is every girl's sacred duty to know how to get herself off.

EK: A duty and an artform that deserves lots of dedicated practice.

Amy: And every boy's too, but we of course, being women, are only going to talk about ourselves. Let's start with how old we were when we masturbated for the first time.

Julia: Yes, let's. How old were you?

Amy: I am not sure, but I remember having stuffed animals on my bed (I'll get to that part later) so I had to be no older than 4th grade. How about you?

EK: I didn't do it until I was 15 and had phone sex with my girlfriend.

Julia: 15?! Wow. I started pretty early. In fact, one of my formative memories, at like 2 or 3 is getting caught. By my mom.

Amy: 2-3? You actually remember things from that age? Ginko Baloba?

Julia: Ha! I remember the look of horror on my mom's face as she walked in with a friend to find me rubbing up against a balled up blanket on our living room floor. And I remember her friend giggling. It's one of my earliest memories.

Amy: omg. That's awesome. Were you embarrassed?

Julia: I was embarrassed only because of that look on my mom's face. I don’t think I knew to be embarrassed until that. It just made me more secretive about it, though.

Amy: Amazing. Now let's tell embarrassing masturbation stories.

Julia: Ha ha! I'm not sure if I have other ones besides that.

Amy: Here's one of my first:

Julia: Oh, good! Spill.

Danielle had been at it for days before she realized Sister Priscilla had said it would make her "blind," not "blond."

Amy: I was in the bathroom at my friend's house and for some reason decided to lay on the floor and hump a shampoo bottle (through my clothes). I put a Reader's Digest under my cheek because I didn't want my face touching the floor.

Julia: Ha! I love it.

Amy: I came out of the bathroom and my friend said "What's that on your cheek?" The print had rubbed onto my skin.

Julia: HA HA HA HA

Amy: I don't know how I tried to explain that away.

Julia: The abridged version of you whacking off. I love it.

Amy: HA! Good one.

EK: When I was about 17 my little brother once found my vibrator and then my mom confiscated it. We were