Team Edward Gets Slashy on Team Jacob's Keister!

Having already grossed $179 million domestically and expected to hit at least $250 million during its full run in theaters, the second movie in the Twilight series, New Moon is a confirmed smash hit. While I prefer vampires of the non-sparkly variety, I am grateful to this franchise for at least offering me the opportunity, once a year, to egg my little sister on in the care and feeding of her sole sign of possessing a geek Achilles heel: she is completely obsessed with Twilight.

Every time one of these movies opens, she and her friends (responsible, late 20-something mothers of small children, all) leave the kids at home with dad, dress up like blood-sucked fangbanger groupies, and wait in line FOR HOURS to see their heroine, Bella, mooning over Edward and Jacob at the midnight opening of the movie. As much as I would like to see a better written and somewhat less thematically appalling literary series serve as inspiration for such a widespread craze, far be it from me in peeing all over someone else's fun in flying their geek flag. You fly that flag with pride, Twilighters!

I do however reserve the right to poke good-natured fun at other people's fandoms, which brings me to this, the most hilarious bit of funning on Twilight I've seen since Tantus's utterly genius "It really SPARKLES!" Vamp dildo. I present to you, Parkers, the Sims 3 movie trailer parody of New Moon:

I love that there's even a bromance dude-slash moment. Ha ha!

So what kind of monsters do you prefer, Parkers? I must admit I have a historic weakness for vampires, but lately I find myself having a bit of a thing for zombies. They're so refreshingly simple and uncomplicated. All you have to do is feed them your annoying high school math teacher and they're as happy as a lesbian in a no-kill cat shelter.