The Realiest L Word Ever

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The Realiest L Word Ever

When lesbian prophet Ilene Chaiken talks, we listen. She has remarked that maybe her next venture will be setting the second season of the Real L Word reality series in Brooklyn. Everyone is talking about what effect this might have on local lesbian economies, hairstyles, and something about moms!

Let me tell you what I really think. I just moved to Brooklyn, and they truly have the realiest lesbians here. AfterEllen is right: there are all kinds of lesbians in all kinds of Brooklyn. Ilene Chaiken knows that if she wants us to keep watching her lesbian puffpaint projects, she needs to get real. Really real. She knows that the Realiest L Word would be in Brooklyn, where the L train takes you right to Lezville.

Not only is it the smartest decision, it’s the most fun one. I really hope this all works out, in some uncertain time in the future. Please please come to Brooklyn! I would love to hate to love the Realiest L Word in person!

Comments [42]

karrr's picture

ok. so the reeeeaaaaaaal

ok. so the reeeeaaaaaaal question is:


would any of you brooklynites put your name in the hat for starring in the show?

Joanne Robertson's picture



KL's picture

the spectrum

so real. brooklyn we go hard. proof: last night. what a delectable spectrum of queers communed at your house! tweens, misanthropes, writers, dancers, painters. high femme transmen (who get no respect in the community). the list goes on.

Lots of love.

Prof C's picture

true. all are welcome in the bosom of my home

let's be the judges on Real L Word: Brooklyn!! I want to be the tim gunn

Not2Taem's picture


Do they do the whole voting people off thing on the RL? Sorry, you're so NOT Gay! Goodbye.

Prof C's picture

no but let's start rumors about RLW

"You are not real, you are fake L, Goodbye!"

Julia Watson's picture

For the survival round, like

For the survival round, like on Drag Race, the two Ls with the lowest score from the panel of judges will have to square off against one another. Prof, you're gonna have to gaze into camera, flip your neck tie over your shoulder and say, "Already, my little realiests. Prepare to PROCESS... FOR YOUR LIFE!"

Not2Taem's picture


You're good!

geek4grammar's picture

hahahahaha YEAH BK :)

thanks for this post prof, and may I say, welcome to the hood. we should all meet up at ginger's and make some lezzie-reality-tv of our own Wink

We're all born naked. The rest is drag.
--RuPaul (appropriating Judith Butler for the masses...)

Prof C's picture

of course

that's sounds fantastic--i've yet to ginger!

geek4grammar's picture

you gotz 2 hit up the slope, son ;)

yeah, that's cause you guys are over in hipster heaven, and it's a bit of a schlep. but it's very much worth the trip to the slope, promise...

We're all born naked. The rest is drag.
--RuPaul (appropriating Judith Butler for the masses...)

Meffle's picture

I tellin' ya

The next hit reality show is Real Lesibian Housewives of the South Bronx!

There's a thin line...still...

Diana Cage's picture

I would watch that. Just

I would watch that. Just sayin'

SMBrown's picture


This is probably just a ruse by Chaiken to get East Coast dykes who don't give a rat's ass about her plastic West Coast cast to support the show...

Steph's picture

hahaha "plastic West Coast

hahaha "plastic West Coast cast"!! Brilliant!

Oh, my girlfriend was naturalised as a British Citizen the week before last - we did it!! Smile

SMBrown's picture


Yippee Steph!  So happy for you both!  Was there a ceremony, or did she just receive something in the mail (which happened to a friend of mine)?

p.s.  less than a fortnight 'til Wimbledon--getting very excited!

Steph's picture

Thanks so much!! Yes, she had

Thanks so much!!
Yes, she had to go a ceremony and swear allegiance to the Queen and sing the national anthem - they don't give the naturalisation certificate to you until you've been to the ceremony! Passport application went off earlier this week so travel will be so much easier!

Oh yes, can't wait for Wimbledon! Will you be watching USA play England in the World Cup (soccer) tomorrow?

SMBrown's picture

Hopefully the Brits aren't

Hopefully the Brits aren't too heavy-handed about the renouncing-your-country-of-birth thing when they make you swear allegiance to the Queen.  I was a bit irked by that part of my girlfriend's swearing-in.  Why can't citizenship be treated by gov'ts like academic degrees?  The more the merrier?  

I've been so caught up in Celtics fever (basketball) that I forgot about the Cup--perish the thought!  So yes, I will try to watch.  I have no clue of when they'll broadcast it here, given the huge time difference with SA.

Steph's picture

She had to apply to keep her

No, no renouncing!! She had to apply to keep her South African citizenship (before she applied fot British Citizenship) but the Brits are fine about it so she has dual citizenship now!

Yes, it's rather handy that there's only an hour's time difference between the UK and RSA! Go England!!

SMBrown's picture

I hear we have our 'deepest'

I hear we have our 'deepest' team ever, so good luck to you!   Wink

Steph's picture

Theoretically we should

Theoretically we should thrash you but I'm not convinced!
I just got a new TV service and I am watching the Celtics playing the Lakers right this minute!

SMBrown's picture

Uh...that must be on tape cuz

Uh...that must be on tape cuz there's no game being played right now.

Steph's picture

Yes, I don't think I get any

Yes, I don't think I get any of the US stuff "live"!!!

I am now watching France playing Uruguay in the World Cup!  Sports fest!


Not2Taem's picture

I remember when the Celtics

I remember when the Celtics were a really good team. Damn that was a long time ago!

SMBrown's picture

Tae, Celts went through a dry

Tae, Celts went through a dry spell, but have been good since they won it all in 2008.

Not2Taem's picture

That's what i get

when I stop watching.  LOL

Lake's picture

Congrats Steph!!!

Woooooohooooo!!!! That's awesome!!!! Wink


Steph's picture

Thanks darlin'!

Thanks darlin'! Smile

minniesota's picture

REAL-ly? REAL-ly?

There's REAL-ly a place called Bushwick in Brooklyn where lesbians reside? That's too good to be true.

Still searching for the right brainy quote.

nerdyboi's picture

Some of my best friends are west coast lesbos....

The streets in Red Hook are my personal favorites. Bush St., Van Dyke, Dikeman...think there's also a Beaver St. in there somewhere!

Julia Watson's picture

Minnie, CT was living in

Minnie, CT was living in Bushwick before I kidnapped her out here!

Not2Taem's picture


Did the lezbos flock to Bushwick or did they rename it after the great migration?  Wink

Grace Moon's picture

your post has inspired

some new names of Brooklyn (cliteral) hoods:

East Beaver-burg

... thats all i got so far.

tweet tweet @gracemoon

nerdyboi's picture


Instead of Park Slope, we used to call it 'Park Slut' (um, in a good way?) and Brooklyn was the People's Republic of Lesbos.

Avar's picture


ROFLMAO!!! Holy crap, that is the best list ever!

South East Missouri has some oddly named places too, towns like  Knob Lick,Mo or  Toad Suck, Mo.  Arkansas has Possum Grape and Hooker, AR.


Robin Rigby's picture

My home state of PA has Mars,

My home state of PA has Mars, Slippery Rock (with a college of the same name) & the best one of all- Blueballs.  There's another odd one that's escaping me right now.  

Grace Moon's picture


is there really a Hooker?

tweet tweet @gracemoon

Avar's picture

Yes Ma'am

I am surprised you are asking about that one. I find Possum Grape to be the oddest one out of the bunch...ok, maybe it's a tie between that and Toad Suck. Oh! I forgot about Flippin, AR...tehehe Just another reason us Missouri natives make fun of Arkansas.

Oh, and for the record, I am not from any of these towns. My home town has a normal, respectable name. lol


And yes, it is real. I had a girlfriend that lived in a town about 15 miles away from Hooker.  I never went there myself but she made fun of it all the time and I did see the road signs for it. It is just a dot on the map if you look it up in google maps near the crossroads of highways 135 and 141. I doubt there is over 200 people living in that town.

Diana Cage's picture

Nice art work!

Nice art work!

Grace Moon's picture


inspired lesbian realism...

tweet tweet @gracemoon

Prof C's picture

thank you. Moon, can you

thank you. Moon, can you tutor me as a visual artist?

Not2Taem's picture

Of all her many talents

that's the one you're asking to partake of?    Puzzled

Never mind. I just remembered that Cage keeps you perpetually exhausted. It all makes sense now.