Gay Translation Made Easy
“The real motivation is to just turn the world gay. I very much want to inject gay culture into the mainstream. I committed myself to them and they committed themselves to me and because of the gay community I’m where I am today.” – Lady Gaga
Hay. It’s not just for horses anymore.
We know it can be so frustrating for others to parse the language of homosexuality, or even to listen to gay people talk. But there's nothing more frustrating than listening to straight people talk about gay people as way to emphasize how gay-straight they truly are.
So let me break this gaga down for you. First off, this Lady wants to turn the world gay and has chosen to employ a “gay infection” methaphor to describe the strategic process through which she will accomplish this feat. I likewise admire her repeated use of the alienating “they” to refer to a minority group (which conveniently doubles as her primary audience). Like so many art school drop-outs before her, Lady Gaga flashes that famous poker face and cashes in her gay chips to get famous, while still being clear about the boundary where she ends and “they” begin.
But wait! I hired a crack team of dishonorably discharged ex-military gay translators to tell us what Lady Gaga really means here. This is what they revealed!
“The real motivation [of my career] is to make a lot of money by smuggling gay taste into unsuspecting suburban households. I want to bareback my way into the mainstream on the heels of my ‘separate but equal’ commitment ceremony that I just had with the boys out back of the Eagle, where I was today for an important photo shoot.” – Lady Gaga
Ribbed for no one’s pleasure.
If you were a real friend to the gays, or even a real performance artist, you’d climb high up into a tree and vow never to take out your hair bow until everyone can legally tie the knot!
Note: Thanks to our friends at girlfriendisahomo.com for bringing this urgent issue to my attention.
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Comments [37]
I must live in a cave....
I don't have a clue who she is.
Really? (as posted below)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWm3tD4OwUI
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Let me get this straight...
Lady Gaga starts out hosting some obscure music show on Logo as a total nobody thanks her gay fan base for helping her to get where she is, promotes queer respectability (if not in those words), and we hate her because she isn't the #1 advocate of gay marriage? Is that really all that we care about? It's all fun and games to throw rocks at people who seem indestructible in the media... Tina Fey, Rachel Maddow, etc, but I can't accept that the only way to support the gay community is to be a fierce advocate of their right to marry. I'm sorry. That is not ALL that we're about. It may sound like DADT and DOMA are the only things that matter if you listen to the HRC, but I'm sorry but there has to be more to us. There are gay people who are against gay marriage and it has absolutely nothing to do with equality and absolutely everything to do with their opposition to the institution of marriage as a whole. Even I have a hard time at Prop 8/DOMA protests because I find the conservative rhetoric spewed by these "real" friends of the gays/gay people unnerving.
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"Bitch, what you don't know about me is that I can just about fit in the Grand fucking Canyon. Did you know that I always wanted to be a dancer in Vegas?" Silent Bob
Interesting
Thanks for your perspective. Say, I was intrigued by your last sentence about the Prop 8/DOMA protests. Would you tell me more about what people were saying and why it unnerved you?
~Mins
Still searching for the right brainy quote.
Prop 8/DOMA frustration
I'm just of the school of thought that believes that marriage (especially in the United States) is an invalid ideal and a scapegoat for the state's responsibility to treat all of it's citizens equally and take care of people who are not willing/able to subscribe to that norm. Thus, to hear about the "importance" of marriage often just highlights various ways that the state is failing us all. Love is love, but state supported marriage covers a bevy of rights that have nothing whatsoever to do with romantic love and everything to do with interdependent households/relationships/etc. I disagree with both sides in the DOMA/Prop 8 battles. I neither believe in preserving the status quo nor amending it in a way that fails the numerous forms of interdependent households that do not fall into the category of adult (romantic) love relationships. I don't think that the state should be incentivizing us to pair up and creating a stigma against those of us who choose to remain single and/or are bound closer to people with whom we have no romantic interest. Every household is unique and I think that we should figure out a way for the government to recognize that diversity.
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"Bitch, what you don't know about me is that I can just about fit in the Grand fucking Canyon. Did you know that I always wanted to be a dancer in Vegas?" Silent Bob
Thanks
Thanks. I think what you said expresses some of my concerns about the emphasis on marriage. I have more thoughts but it is late and I must go to bed now.
Still searching for the right brainy quote.
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nutty
http://iowntheworld.com/blog/?p=10429
I was under the impression LGG's Bisexual?
Whilst I'm not a full blown fan, I like her (even though she has a creepy friendship with Perez) ... but I put that down to her age.
If we are going to talk about an artist hitching their star to the gay community, for profit, adulation etc ... let's talk about Madonna.
As a lifelong Madonna fan, I have grown cynical of her commitment to LGBT. It was evident during Prop 8, where I believe she only made a weak shoutout - while she was on her tour (naturally, in front of thousands of gays) ... It came only after people started asking "where's Madonna?". It was way too little, too late.
I see a lot of parallels between LGG and Madonna's early career - in the way she seems to push people's buttons and the way the press has mocked/dismissed her.
Then there's the tirade of misogynism directed towards LGG online, that people seem to think is quite acceptable - because she's had the audacity to be 'sexual' in her videos ... "she's a man" "has a dick" "Dyke" "tranny" "Ugly bitch" "is she slow?" "on drugs" "space cadet" are the common YouTube comments.
I can see beyond the sexy image - at least LGG's attempting to be original / different. I'd much rather see her at a gay event like Dinah, than fraud Katy Perry.
Oh ... and I want her thigh's:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWm3tD4OwUI
I am so out of it
Who the heck is Lady Gaga? Also, that bow she is wearing in that pic scares me. I'm allergic to bows.
Still searching for the right brainy quote.
The phrase I have been looking for
I'm allergic to bows.
Minnie, dearest, where have you been all my life? I have been trying to think of somethign like that since I was six.
LOL
Tae, I think I told my mother that at age four and that's when she said, "You are a smart aleck."
Still searching for the right brainy quote.
Al Lick
Did you say Al Lick?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULjCSK0oOlI
I can just imagine what that glint looked like in a child's eyes. LOL
omg
all this time I thought it was your giant purple dolphin dildo, but when it comes down to it, this kinda thing is why I love you
People like to use us....
ala Kathy Griffin, Katy Perry, Jennifer Beals......OMG, did I just say Jennifer Beals?!?! Are there still TiBetters?
Twitter Time @kdhales
Howdy Tex!"Are there still
Howdy Tex!
"Are there still Tibetters?"
*Raises hand" Uh...yeah. lol *blush*
Don't be hatin' on Ms. Beals now. I do believe she meant it when she said she loves our community.
She just forgot about us. lol
"Fight Prime Time. Read a Book"
Well, Miss Kitty!
Are you wearing out those TLW dvd's - S1E1, S2E9, S5E4, S5E6, S5E9.........
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgDKZjhfIDk
Chose this TiBette clip in honor of our PPOTUS and all those that freely give in order for us to conceive.
Twitter Time @kdhales
Yep, those are the ones!
Yep, those are the ones! lol Hey, where's a girl going to get some great lesbian tv entertainment like that anymore? Actually I haven't watched them in a while but I do still dig them out on occasion or visit Youtube.
"Fight Prime Time. Read a Book"
i'm actually a fan
of Kathy Griffin, i can do without the rest.
tweet tweet @gracemoon
I'm her fan too
but she'd better hurry up and trip the light fandango with a woman - oh yeah, she's a big fan with gay peeps! I don't give a sh#t! The woman needs to visit the Y! Speaking of Wanda......and Healthcare....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDAAvxZwlpg&NR=1
Twitter Time @kdhales
We can always count
on Wanda.
I volunteer
to induct KG
Be genital
She's used to those flaccid man things.
(a double c? Could spell check be playing with me?)
I think you would be an
I think you would be an excellent choice for inductor! But if she's in to older women I'm her woman!
Twitter Time @kdhales
I love KG
I love Kathy Griffin. I have a shrine to her in my bedroom.
Still searching for the right brainy quote.
You told me that was a shrine
You told me that was a shrine to ME!
Seriously though, I think KG knows she's popular with gays, loves & respects gays, but isn't taking advantage of us for career purposes. After all, her jokes are all about celebrities, not gays.
I get what you're saying...
guess it's all in your meaning of taking advantage. While she may not be taking advantage of us, she is definitely taking advantage of her gay popularity. Kathy is a shrewd business woman - I don't fault her a bit. Although, if I was a stand up, I'd have an awfully hard time playing to heteros......well.....making a living off of hetero jokes? Yeah, If they could laugh at themselves I'd give it a try!
Twitter Time @kdhales
I could be wrong, but I think
I could be wrong, but I think that anyone with an ounce of integrity wouldn't take advantage of or use a minority group for their own career purposes (Unless they're Republicans). lol That's just so....cold.
"Fight Prime Time. Read a Book"
historically, all politicians
historically, all politicians regardless of party do *it* to us. the christian conservative burns us in effigy and the liberals take our money and say "the public's not ready for [the "it" du jour] yet...look at the alternative...you'll just have to be patient". i'd like to hope this is changing but i've also heard different variations of the same song over and over again since i came out in 1981.
"there will never be a technology more advanced than the human mind - fully engaged in the divine process of being. technology is a tool not a destination." me.
Didn't you get to meet Ms.
Didn't you get to meet Ms. Beals? Don't tell me she's fake and burst my happy Beals bubble.
*You don't have to answer that.
"Fight Prime Time. Read a Book"
let me say this
we all have good days and bad ones.
tweet tweet @gracemoon
Oh I'm totally with you.
Oh I'm totally with you.
"Fight Prime Time. Read a Book"
Question
From the commitmentphobe corner — we don't have to accept her commitment, do we?
"When you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will." ~ Pollyanna
Stop.....
saying the 'C' word......gives me hives!!!!! ;) LOL!!!
Lake
Hey!
I've been thinking of holding a benefit.
hey, why doesn't she just
hey, why doesn't she just turn herself gay? too risky? cha-ching.
"there will never be a technology more advanced than the human mind - fully engaged in the divine process of being. technology is a tool not a destination." me.