Gay Christian Singer Jennifer Knapp Explores Common Ground

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Gay Christian Singer Jennifer Knapp Explores Common Ground

Christian singer Jennifer Knapp penned a piece for CNN.com that explores her relationship with faith through the lens of her homosexuality. She's just released a new record after many years while also coming out. It's definitely worth a read. Here's an excerpt:

"I just wanted to explore my faith. I simply wanted to meet others, converse, encourage and learn about how to be ... well, a meaningful person. I have definitely found myself in the midst of an adventure I would have never imagined or called for.

This was the world I found myself in when I realized I was gay. After years of subtle comments, wary glances and leading encouragement to get married and have babies, I was fully aware that I had a foot in the door of some houses that were about to be slammed. At the same time, I had experienced years of rich and fulfilling dialogue with many people of faith who taught me the soft landings of compassion. Still, it was hard not to respond to the fear. I questioned whether my faith had betrayed me, or I if had a betrayed my faith."

 



Comments [82]

karrr's picture

you can still speak your mind

you can still speak your mind and do it in a way that will provoke insightful dialogue instead of sides and anger. 

Joanne Robertson's picture

To mysticsmb

Annoying. 

Yes, that's The Word.

I'm purging some history, for a number of reasons...

and yeah, there should be an easier way.  It won't take long. 

As you were, Vpers... 

Resume the bitching, fightpicking, eating our own people ... 

Continue to mock and question if certain women are "gay enough" to be identifying themselves as such.  How dare Showtime give a show to fun loving, successful lesbians?! ...  Surely tv viewers would rather watch navel-gazing, bitter, bickering "processing" dykes, at their everyman job? 

Is there a right way to be closeted and a wrong way to come out?  

Jesus, I'd hate to be a confused baby dyke clicking on Velvetpark for some solace & answers.

Edit.

Grace ... Unless there's a profile annihilation button that I'm not aware of, please delete my profile etc. in a few days.  It's easier.

Thanks.

Joanne.

SMBrown's picture

Well then by all means go to

Well then by all means go to some other lesbians sites---oh yeah, except they all think Real LWord is a piece of trash too...

Joanne Robertson's picture

Go?

I'm already there mystics (always have been).

The vibe here is weird.  It's negative and there's always been too small a group commenting.  I've been here since the move from OC and that problem (sadly) has not changed.

SMBrown's picture

Lead by example

Joanne, why not lead by example?  While people may have disagreed with you at times, I don't recall anyone ever saying you give off a weird 'vibe,' that you should express an opinion other than what you believe/feel.  And yet that's exactly what you're saying to 'us.'  And just who is 'us'?  This idea that there's some monolithic viewpoint on here is, and I've said this before, patently false.  As just one example, Rusty and I often agree on political issues but as you can see on this blog we vehemently DISagree.  Tex explains it better (below) than I could possibly hope to--but essentially everyone is just being who they are.  You are welcome to do the same.    

As for the LWord, it's over and done for me.  It's what initially brought me to OurChart, but not why I stayed.  Obviously it's played a far more important role in your life and that's GREAT!  But there are heaps of fan sites out there that surely must satisfy your continued attachment to it.  Why must VP cater to that when it already exists elsewhere?

I've checked out other lesbian sites as well, but have found them mostly focused on celebrity culture and pop media--hence the comments don't seem particular substantive, for MY tastes.   I've yet to find another site that discusses weightier issues and features really thoughtful, meaty debate on topics that affect our daily lives.  

Re: your concern for baby dykes coming to this site for 'solace and answers.'  What will they think when they see a front page filled with '.' because someone (and you're not the only one) has had a hissy-fit and stomped off?  

Joanne Robertson's picture

There's no hissy.

There's no stomping.  I had a point to make and am moving on.

and only returned to see if my profile is gone - it isn't.

Not2Taem's picture

What I don't get

I agree that things can sometimes get negative here. Unfortunately it has become a sort of loop to an extent. When I find myself doing it, I try to take a step back and resist the urge. But the fact is, it happens. What I don't get, JR, is your approach when you disagree with what we say. Isn't the level of negativity also influenced by the way you receive our comments? If you are bothered by this and really want your experience here to be a positive one, why not make an independent comment stating your own thoughts and feelings about the initial post, rather than analyzing and criticizing the comments already posted? I mean, the back and forth aspect is a major advantage of the site, but not if it causes you stress.

I actually appreciate being able to read different view points, but I sometimes skip your comments because I think, "Well, this will be another shot at the person she is responding to, then that person will lob one back... And when you do something like go back and replace all your comments with a period, that feels to me like you are trying to disrupt the history of the site.

Largely due to your being so vocal about this, I have begun to spend time on other sites as well. I have found that there are pockets of negative comments that pop up everywhere. A lot of the difference I see is in the way they are received. People either respond with humor, or add a new element to the discussion that gives it a jump start in a different direction, or they disagree (sometimes quite vehemently) and move on. They pound the thing to death a lot less often than we do here. I also see a lot of repetition in the folks who comment, just as there is here, especially if you look at who responds to certain types of topics.

With this in mind, I am going to serious think about whether it is making a positive contribution before I respond more than once to someone I disagree with. I will also strongly consider posting an independent comment from the beginning in such cases.

Anyway, I truly hope you find a place or approach that is more comfortable for you. I hate to see someone who is clearly cleaver and articulate in such constant agitation.

Peace

Tex's picture

Snuggling up between you two this morning....

You know, I'm still pissed at Ilene Chaiken....I'm just never gonna be able to forgive her (oh well, just one Smile for some things she did:

1. Kill off Dana

2. Didn't have Tina give Bette her Kiki Smith "Fawn" back in some show stopping romantic gesture

3. Erase the chart! Erased the Chart, y'all! And they sold the props from the show - no chart! When she did that I knew the woman had no vision....or sense of worth!

Have a great morning - off to a meeting! Big smooches all around....

 

Twitter Time @kdhales

Joanne Robertson's picture

Tex

Everyone's entitled to their opinion.  My life was changed by The L Word, but I'm not going to bore you with my life saving story....  I know most dykes here don't want to hear it.

I saw the faults.  Almost every tv show f*cks up at some point and ends in a way that leaves viewers saying FTW? ... It happens all the time. 

Usually, normal viewers move on ... but not in the case of this "community".  We call for the firing squad.   

The bloggers who write for lesbian sites need to keep in mind, that just because they have their own personal agendas, experience, unresolved crush/love/hate feelings for Chaiken, their readers may have benefitted greatly from her projects.  If they can't handle writing a balanced review, then by all means write their blog, but find someone else who can give an alternative perspective.  To do otherwise is selfish and not catering to a large number of lesbians.

We are all different.  I'd like to have my interests catered to as well .... Not all of us are chronic cynics, who won't support a dyke project just because of who made it, the brand, or because it might be pop culture "popular".

Tex's picture

Different views....and styles

You have to think about that when you read comments. Ask yourself. Is that person literal, humorous, sarcastic.....trying to bring levity? Just as in my case above, I was trying to bring some levity to a topic and thread that had gone way passed its prime....TLW was also life changing to me.  We all can agree to that. 

As far as Vp....in the scheme of things it is a babe. It, just as a lot of us, is going through growing pains. But, its growing pains are magnified due to its public nature. Can you imagine trying to please so many lesbians? 

Bore us with your life saving story? I doubt that seriously. Why not tell us about yourself so we can understand you more? How are we ever to know if we're not told? You, as well as everyone here, know about me. Like me or hate me, but don't insult me. If for no other reason, it's just rude. You freely call others here names, and throw insults with ease for how they take part. You really shouldn't do that. No one should do that....not here....not anywhere. 

Take a look at your comment to me above. How many insults did you throw out in it? You, Joanne, are a "chronic cynic". You bop this site, bloggers, and those who comment on a regular basis. Do you realize that? 

bloggers..."that just because they have their own personal agendas, experience, unresolved crush/love/hate feelings for Chaiken". Really? You know that for a fact? You personally know these bloggers? Ever met any of them? Sat down and had a conversation with any of them? I have....you're way out of line with that statement. That's your personal opinion and the snide comment is unwarranted. You owe some people an apology for that one. People's dislike for TRLW is not because Ilene Chaiken produces it. They dislike it because it is terrible. That is a worldwide consensus. 

We really don't have to support every lesbian cause or project. We should make up our own minds and do what what we feel. Support our causes because we are passionate about them, and respect those whose passions lie elsewhere. 

Joanne, you're the worst cynic here....towards the site. You know, Diana Cage is never going to belong to a Catholic order - well, maybe the Catholic Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, but I digress, Katie is never going to become a bull dyke, Julia is gonna always love Lady Gaga, Kelly's passions are music and the search for truths, the Professor draws wisdom from those who have gone before, and Grace continues on with patience and fortitude. They are who they are...just as we are who we are. Accept them and us or choose others to play with. It's really that simple.

 

 

Twitter Time @kdhales

Julia Watson's picture

Reduction Sauce

Can I at least be known as the Writer Geek In Love With Gaga?

xoxo

Tex's picture

Ah, indeed....

our Vp saucier! A veloute'.....

Twitter Time @kdhales

SMBrown's picture

AMEN!

AMEN!

Steph's picture

What in the name of holy hell

What in the name of holy hell is a Kiki Smith "Fawn", my love?

Tex's picture

In addition to Mystic below...

http://www.artnet.com/AUCTIONS/Pages/Lots/27479.aspx?lotId=27479&page=1

Bette had to sell her"Fawn" when she and Tina were having financial problems. I just knew after they got back on their feet Tina was going to buy it back and surprise Bette with it. But NOOOOOOOO! Heavenforbid someone actually did something as terribly romantic and throughtful as that! Oh well, in my ending to TLW, Tina got it back for her!  

Wink

Twitter Time @kdhales

Not2Taem's picture

Now I'm wondering...

How would Bette react to that? Would she be a sweetly grateful, or would her fierce competitive side lead her to see it as "throwing it in her face" that Tina was now able to support her? Either way, that would have been a really good episode.

Tex's picture

in the right surroundings...

soft lighting, low music, a chilled chardonnay....the right words....there it is on the wall.....what better way to show her you truly understood her sacrifice for your family. You know, in a materialistic way. The sex that would have ensued would have been unforgettable!

Wink

Twitter Time @kdhales

Lake's picture

With the exception of the painting on the wall.....

I've had a few nights like that!! Wink

Lake

SMBrown's picture

Not to answer for your 'love'

Not to answer for your 'love' but Fawn is a print by artist Kiki Smith that art-lover Bette owned...

Steph's picture

Ha! Thanks.....

Ha!

Thanks.....Smile

SMBrown's picture

Off topic

OT--don't forget men's semis at noon EST.  Not sure which match is up first.  Can't believe RFed is out!  Makes Nadal/Murray more like a final.

Edit: Berdych has already beaten Djocovic in straight sets.  Nadal/Murray underway.

Steph's picture

Glued to the Murray/Nadal

Glued to the Murray/Nadal match!!

Btw, you "over-therapised America" comment made me laugh out loud... although I'm not sure it was meant to! Wink

Tex's picture

Missed first because of meeting...

watching now! Hey, sweet cheeks.....

Twitter Time @kdhales

SMBrown's picture

Phew, glad Nadal got the

Phew, glad Nadal got the first set, but it's going to be tight all the way.

p.s. just heard Brazil lost to the Dutch!

Robin Rigby's picture

We're women with opinions who

We're women with opinions who aren't afraid to speak our minds. When you (or anyone else) tells me to toe the party line & keep my trap shut then I hear all those men for centuries who thought women should shut up, cook, and pop out babies. It's like you're reviving the whole 'uppity women' BS.

If a baby dyke does find her way to VP then I hope she'll find a place where she can just be her but also learn that lesbians come in all sorts of different flavors and that she takes parts of what she learns to make herself a better person. 

Joanne Robertson's picture

What a joke.

Robin - your final sentence was an answer right out of Miss America, and not based in the harsh reality of the unspoken 'rules' for commenting here at Vp.

Robin Rigby's picture

Exit, Stage Left

It's past time already. 

Joanne Robertson's picture

It's people

like you Robin, who will eventually implode this site.

I hope Grace sees the forest from the trees.

Bye bye.

MacLass_19's picture

I read Jennifer Knapps CNN piece

 "I questioned whether my faith had betrayed me, or if I had betrayed my faith."

It appears that her faith has guided her in the direction that she was meant to travel. I would love to see her perform. Until then, I'll be buying her latest CD in support of her spiritual journey.

"Where music had led me to very strange lands, full of people with differing faith practices, cultural expectations, gender roles and more ... it had taught me to listen. Through the torrent of life’s confusion and seeming incongruities, there is a spirit, a song, that if we strain hard enough, we can hear. What we can hear, when we listen, is how we are much the same."

What an awesome interpretation of what could have been, a very negative life experience. It's also beautiful to know that she's been in an eight year relationship with a woman that she loves.... Congratulations to you Jennifer, love is the true blessing.

 [edited for spelling] 

Lake's picture

Kelly....

Good to read you!!!

 

Caravan to Canada.......I'm just sayin!!!! Wink

Lake

Kelly McCartney's picture

Change o' plans...

I may be headed further west next year. We'll see. I've long dreamed of living on an island.

Won't you be my neighbor? @theKELword

Tex's picture

Excuse the jump between....although

the thought of being between you two is making for an extremely erotic fantasy.......mmmmmm. Anyway, I am officially applying to be your island personal assistant!

Twitter Time @kdhales

Lake's picture

Sounds ....

good!!! Island life would be awesome!!!!

Lake

deedee's picture

I am very mad right now

You guys DON'T know any of what you are TALKING about !I have want to 2 of Chely Wrights concerts and one of her book signings ,and she is been one of the sweetest ladies I have got to met.It's funny how lesbians eat there own.

 

So SAD.

SMBrown's picture

Wasn't she kinda 'eating her

Wasn't she kinda 'eating her own' (pardon the pun) when she admitted to ragging on other gay people?

Rusty's picture

The way I read that is that

The way I read that is that she's trying to show the ugliness of living in the closet. It's pretty clear that she's not bragging about what she did:

"It was not easy to write the crappy stuff I did. When you sit down and write a memoir, you can write yourself as, “Oh, look at how great I am and look at this and look at that,” but as I told Oprah, to write down your crimes and the lies you told — writing down the sentence, “I became a skilled liar,” was a hard sentence to write. It was difficult."

http://www.afterellen.com/people/2010/5/chely-wright-interview

"When you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will." ~ Pollyanna

Robin Rigby's picture

But, when you admit to having

But, when you admit to having been a douchebag and especially when you tell Oprah how hard it was to admit to being one, aren't you creating a mythology of sorts around how different and great a person you are now?  I think if you're honest you say "I was a douchebag.  I work really hard to not be one now, but I'm not perfect."  Not "I'm totally changed."  Going on Oprah and talking about how different you are now comes across as bragging.  

FYI, I don't know this woman.  I have not read her book.  I have not seen her Oprah interview.  I'm speaking in more general terms.  Not about her specifically. 

Lake's picture

Hey can someone tell me the difference....

between a 'fucktard' and a 'douchebag'?   Wink

Lake

Robin Rigby's picture

A matter of taste, I think.

A matter of taste, I think.  Hehe. 

I thought you were going to bed?  

Lake's picture

The question was.....

keeping me up!

 

Not sure I want to taste either one!!! ;)   Night!!!

Lake

Robin Rigby's picture

Night Hot Stuff.

Night Hot Stuff. Wink

Robin Rigby's picture

I tend to trust Kelly's

I tend to trust Kelly's information considering that she has the inside track on this stuff.  It's impossible to get to know any one in the 30 seconds you can talk to them at a book signing.  As for a performer on stage at a concert, they are just that- a performer.  It's not about them as a real person, with flaws.  

deedee's picture

So can YOU tell me

Just how much time Kelly has been with her ?????????.Oh I am sorry Kelly knows the real person Ms Wright is .You say how you feel (you don't like her )and I say how I feel (like her)NO wait, Kelly knows who the real Chely Wright is, lets ask her!

Kelly McCartney's picture

I've not met her.

I used to live a few blocks away from her and her ex-girlfriend. And we have numerous friends in common. One of those friends -- whom I trust -- knows two of her ex-gfs and has told me how badly Chely treated both of them. She was just mean to them unnecessarily.

Now, I've been in the music biz for 20+ years, so I can tell you that there's often -- not always -- a stark difference between the reality an artist sets forth on stage and with fans as opposed to who they are in private.

For Chely's sake and that of her future partners, I hope that the meanness was just part of her fear from being exposed. Maybe she's worked through that.

 

Won't you be my neighbor? @theKELword

Not2Taem's picture

Just keepin' it real

I have no opinion on these ladies so this is just a passing thought: Exes tend to have a biased opinion. Anyway, would we rather that she lie about her poor behavior and try to cover it up. Then we would be dissing her for that.

Tex's picture

Dissing?

Who's dissing?!?!? 

Wink

Did you know that Dis was a Roman god?

Twitter Time @kdhales

Not2Taem's picture

I prefer the Norse version

Robin Rigby's picture

I never said I didn't like

I never said I didn't like her.  I expressed an opinion on this thread about the behavior of some people, not Chely in particular.  But Kelly pointed out that she was one of the people who has engaged in this behavior.  As to how well Kelly may know her- you'd have to ask her.  But Kelly works in the industry (or has) and knows a lot of musicians.  

I don't know Chely, have never met her for even a few seconds, and don't pretend that I do know her.  

Rusty's picture

I've been out since jr high

double post

"When you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will." ~ Pollyanna

Tex's picture

Not judging?

Really? Maybe that's my point. Chely and others are deliberately nasty to others. I don't understand people like that. Does that make me judgmental? Or does it make someone else judgmental cause they think I'm full of s because I say I don't treat people like that? Expressing your point and questioning is not judging. Accusing someone of it is. Don't you think?

Twitter Time @kdhales