Game of Thrones 3.5: The Moment You Realize You're Marrying Gay Loras

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Game of Thrones 3.5: The Moment You Realize You're Marrying Gay Loras

Five episodes in and Game of Thrones is weaving themes at a machinic pace, yet so finely. We finally realize why people are invested in that little gingersnap Sansa, which results in a gay Littlefinger plot to expose the Tyrell's motives.

 

(From last week's Happy Place GoT recap.)

Sansa really doesn't care. She just wants to get the hell out of King's Landing, and not even she realizes her "key" role as, um, the key to Winterfell...which is looking more and more likely since her douchebag brother thinks he can steal Casterly Rock from the Lannisters.

By "bringing out the gay" in Our Knight of Flowers, Littlefinger provides the Lannisters with some "key" information about how the Tyrells plan to usurp their power—well, at least some of it. So, during a small counsel meeting (and how small it is!), Tywin announces, thanks to Cersei's doing, that the newly minted Master of Coin will marry Sansa.

Cersei takes delight in buttpunching her little brother.

He doesn't seem too pleased.

But, lest Cersei think she's won the game, her daddy tells her he has plans for her, too. In an attempt to quash those dirty "rumors" about her and her twin brother, as well as an attempt to secure House Tyrell, Tywin tells Cersei she's going to marry Gay Loras. Not only, he tells her, is she to marry him, but she's to have his children—again, in order to secure the Tyrell's wealth as their own.

Her reaction is priceless.

Our poor, poor, queen regent just wants that "Brother-D," mind you, a brother who is fainting in the baths recounting why he slayed the Mad Targaryan king to Brienne (the Mad King wanted to burn all the citizens of King's Landing to death with that store of wildfire that Tyrion used to fight off Stannis last season), and the episode leaves us with this quizzical look

Cersei ain't got time for Gay Loras. I have little doubt she'll figure out a plan to avoid this impending gay union....might it involve her son?

Perhaps next week will reveal all.....