After Pride, Where do All of the Gays Go?

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After Pride, Where do All of the Gays Go?

After washing my face 4 times the night after NYC Pride and once again the following morning I was finally able to get all of the green eye shadow, the fake feather lashes, and red glitter that would make Dorothy as green as the Wicked Witch of the West with envy. 

My rainbow painted finger nails are slowly chipping away in wonderfully ironic "who gives a fuck" lesbian chick and my toesies are still rockin' their PRIDE.  I'm back to work, toiling away, and getting hit on by men and it made me wonder-Where Did all the Gays Go?  

Clearly, we're every where it's just that we don't see each other as much after Pride. I mean, during Pride it feels like the entire city is LGBTQ. I took the train home at 2AM on Sunday night a little nervous because of my crazy make up, short cut-off shorts, Dykes on Bike-Cycles T-Shirt and rainbow painted nails.

Just the day before in broad daylight a woman on 2nd Ave called me a "Faggot-ass mother fucker" so I was sure that I was going to get harassed on the train. Instead Latina and black gays and lesbians piled on the train with me at West 4th Street and rode all the way to my stop in very West Indian Brooklyn with their rainbow flags, holding hands without a timid or watchful glance. The next day walking down the street No Homos, and I'm not quoting Kanye here. I literally saw zero visible homos.

I am aware that everyday is not appropriate for men to walk around bare-chested with glitter and feathers but for the whole of the weekend there's such a wonderful feeling of community. Whether or not you're at a party you are guaranteed to see at least 5 same-sex couples in about an hour. On the train, walking down the street, riding bikes you see another gay person, you catch eyes, you smile, and you continue on your way. The out and proud t-shirts are abundant, the smiles come easily, and it's as if we can finally live our lives like normal people because we are, after all, normal people. It saddens me that out of the entire year for only one weekend we can feel comfortable being ourselves.   

My girlfriend and I walk down the street holding hands often but it's interesting when and where we drop hands.  We can take a turn down an unfamiliar street or just as we're about to board a train, or walking through a neighborhood that's not our own we stop being girlfriends and walk as "friends" until we've sussed out the situation and assured ourselves that it's ok.  I know a guy who used to hold his boyfriend's hand on the L train until they got to a certain stop. 

After that stop they'd keep their hands on their individual laps and walk side-by-side until they arrived home.  Perhaps we need more than just one month to be out and proud.  How is the world supposed to see us normally, minus the men in heels, the the half-naked women, the drag queens, but US. LGBTQ individuals doing every day things like waking up, running late, and going to work. 

Comments [15]

Uncle Aimee's picture

Where have all the homos gone? Doo doo doo, doo doo doo...

Seriously, this town dries up like a puddle of beer the day after St. Patty's.  Does everyone flee to Fire Island or P-Town directly afterwards, and for the entire summer?  Its full-gay on display and then not a queer in sight.  Makes dating a bitch if you missed the march and/or parade.

Let me then put out a blanket statement to our lesbian friends here in NYC:


And if you're that hot chick who came to my job after the parade and showed me your goods, gimme a call ;-P

minniesota's picture

Beach side

Aimee, don't they all go to Fire Island and/or the Hamptons for the summer? Just Minnesota everyone, gay or straight, goes up North to a Lake.

Still searching for the right brainy quote.

Erika Davis's picture

I remember the beach

It has sand and stuff, right?

Erika has spoken.
Now, go read my blog Smile

Uncle Aimee's picture


Fire Island or P-Town or sumpin.  But the breeders are taking over Fire Island now.  My sister went out there with her boyfriend this weekend and while looking for a place to stay, tells me that she was surprised to find out that some hotels and B&B's are "men only".  I turned around and said, "STOP TAKING OUR STUFF FROM US!"

Not2Taem's picture

Women only?

Anyone have a lead on hotels and B&B's that are for women only? Anywhere?

Grace Moon's picture

in general?

or on fire Isl?

I've been once a long time ago to Cherry Grove, which is supposed to be the lesbo side of fire isl. i was there visiting a gay boyfriend who rented a cottage.  it wasn't as lesbian as the gay boy side is gay, typically.

tweet tweet @gracemoon

Not2Taem's picture

In general

Thanks for the tip, though. I never even knew there is supposed to be a lesbo side of the island. My godfather used to live in RI, but aside from driving through, I've not been there since I was wee. I just think the idea of a female only hotel is amazing, and any place called Cherry Grove has to have something going for it.

SMBrown's picture

I haven't been in Cherry

I haven't been in Cherry Grove in a decade, but there were definitely women-only guest houses and B&Bs.  And P-Town has several, just not on the scale of the party-boys only hotels...  

Erika Davis's picture

So True!

I'm here and I'm queer and I just want to see other queers!  That's all I'm saying!  I feel like there should be an abundance of gayness every day of the year.

Erika has spoken.
Now, go read my blog Smile

Uncle Aimee's picture


Why is it we only get one weekend out of the year not to be admonished for holding our sweetie's hand?  Too bad we can't flip the script and tell the breeders to get a room when they're slobbering all over each other in public.  Wait, I do that anyway.  And I don't care what anyone says - gay dudes making out is HOT.  Can't we all just get in love and get along?

Tex's picture


If that all points on Vp works for ya, let us know! I'm thinking we need a full twelve months of showing the goods!  


Edit: What the heck? An angel 'con for me? Def a typo.....


Twitter Time @kdhales

Uncle Aimee's picture

I feel like the Abie Hoffman

I feel like the Abie Hoffman of the "stay out AFTER Pride" movement.

I'll call my book "Steal This Underwear".

Not2Taem's picture

Excellent point!

With that responsibility in mind, I am going to go right out and find a full time GF to hold hands with everywhere. Thanks for the nudge.   Wink

Erika Davis's picture

Hold Hands and start making babies, immediately!

There's nothing I love to see more than ladies (and gents) holding hands as they walk down the street.

Erika has spoken.
Now, go read my blog Smile

Not2Taem's picture

Ehh, no!

My baby is in her 20's and I would not give her up for the world, but there is just no way I am doing that again. But if you decide to go for and need a birthing coach, ring me up.